Is it possible for women and men to be ‘just friends?’ How important is it?

A question from a reader of my book: “Can men and women be ‘just friends?’”

Response: HUMBLY speaking as a REALLY dumb fellow…yes, I believe women and men CAN be ‘just friends.’ Respectfully, this may just be one of the ‘keys to the universe.’ I have splendid friendships with many women, in the here and now and historically. It doesn’t in any way have to be about sex. This may sound naive and quaint, but I don’t believe it is so. It is sad that we often miss out on what may be among the most splendid of blessings/gifts (female/male friendships). This is on every level, emotional, spiritual, and overall health/wellness…resplendently so.

Living in a semi-rural area (versus also having lived in a large metropolitan area for many years), I find that many men (especially) act like they have an intrinsic responsibility to (on some level) ‘hit’ on every woman, or they don’t feel like ‘real men.’ Humbly, I am no one ‘special’ or important, albeit I find that learned and/or cultural outlook embarrassing. Sex IS a SO splendid blessing, yet everything doesn’t have to be about that.

Please know that I’m not saying I am in ANY way some ‘sweet and innocent’ fellow…it is NOT the spirit in which I am setting forth my thoughts herein. That said, among the most splendid blessings in my life, is in being ‘just friends’ with many women, i.e., who I believe are most often the superior half of people. In having such friendships, I sincerely see this as a most splendid part of my good fortune.

Once again (and again, and again, and again, if necessary) quite humbly and respectfully, I believe it is SO much about a benevolent and altruistic spirit of dignity, decency, goodness, and grace…AND figuring out how to TRULY mean it, No Matter What! I believe it is SO much about a benevolent and altruistic spirit of endeavoring to do the right thing for the right selfless sake. I believe it is SO much about realization that we are so much more in the same common ‘boat’ than we often think and act. — Dr. Glen Hepker

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Michal Bick of the LA Examiner reviews my book…

Reviewing a ‘Glimpse of Heaven’ by Dr. Glen Hepker

A Five Star Rating

In the healthcare industry, Physicians serve to help patients alleviate/eradicate our illnesses. But what if individuals were able to prevent illness by having healthier internal and external environments? What would the world look like if every person took an active role in his/her own health and wellbeing?

Dr. Glen Hepker, who has doctorates in Psychology and traditional Chinese health arts, explores these types of questions in his book, A Glimpse of Heaven: The Philosophy of True Health. He gently advocates the mentality that growth is linear and how self-improvement can help make the world a better place to live in.

Board-certified psychiatrist Mark Lassise, M.D., encourages readers in his Foreward to keep an open mind when going through the book — To consider how medicine, psychology and philosophy can intertwine.

Dr. Hepker suggests “embracing healthful change” by focusing first on one’s internal world. This includes: thought patterns, interactions with others, the friends we prefer, the degree of exercise and nutritious dietary intake, etc. Does a human being feel heavier or lighter as a result of these choices?

With an enhanced awareness of one’s own decision making, a person’s quality of health could be better understood and then hopefully changed for the better. For example, what solution would promote health if heavy feelings arise after spending time with particular people?

Put another way, what steps can a person take to feel lighter? Perhaps by implementing this strategy, a person can make it a daily habit to prefer choices that gravitate towards a healthier and happier life.

He writes:

“Enforcing healthful change and thus a more and more healthful way-of-life is not simply just good for oneself – It is less costly to society and less harmful to the world at large: It makes the world a better place on multiple levels” (42).

By taking responsibility for one’s own health, a person can also encourage others who want to improve their lifestyle.

When considering preventative medicine, the philosophy of this book suggests another way to improve one’s quality of life. By having a new perspective to reflect on, it can very well benefit a person who is committed to personal growth.

For more information, check out Dr. Hepker’s websites:

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How healthful is it that our moods so often dictate the spirit with which we treat others?

What is the importance of treating people just as well in our worst of moods vs. just our best of moods (and figuring out how to TRULY mean it)?

“When describing the philosophy within the traditions of the health and wellness arts which I teach and coach, I commonly begin by defining the theory of the Bright Beautiful School of Thought, e.g., the principle that the world would be a much better and different place if more and more people took True Responsibility for their own health and wellbeing – in short, True Health Through True Responsibility. In practical application, a central feature of the Bright School of Thought theory and hence, True Health, is the True Responsibility of Healthful Interaction – the employment of dignity, decency, goodness, and grace in our interaction with others – AND figuring out how to do so while truly meaning it – No Matter What.

According to this theory, there are two things that we as human beings can absolutely control…the fashion by which we interact with others and the level of objectivity and insight we choose to employ with ourselves. In support of this thesis, is the concept that a clear gauge of one’s True Health is congruent with one’s ability to honestly display oneself with “dignity, decency, goodness, and grace” – inclusive of the realization that the quality of our interaction with others and the depth by
which we enjoy insight into ourselves is a primary gauge of our wherewithal to manage stress and anxiety (inclusive of stressors of ALL shapes and sizes).

In a fundamental sense, this notion is congruent with the Golden Rule: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” It is just honest and healthful diplomacy, whether with a spouse or other loved one, a friend or acquaintance, a coworker, or with anyone we come into contact with – a store clerk or waitperson. If we wish to take True Responsibility for ourselves, it is the REAL CHALLENGE – No Matter What.” (Copyright 2011) — Dr. Glen Hepker


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Don’t look for angels…

Oh boy, with many, I am likely getting myself in trouble with making such a statement. Please know I don’t say it in a spirit of wanting to promote controversy. I am speaking to a notion of ‘true responsibility,’ and herein will hopefully do so in a humble and respectful spirit…loosely this being consistent with the saying, “God helps them that helps themselves.” In making the statement, “Don’t look for angels,” I am setting forth that you (I, and everyone else) BE YOUR OWN bright beautiful angel and make the world a better place: What a different world it would be, as more and more and more of us learn to see this as a True Responsibility.

Why is it that we so commonly look outside of ourselves for help, when we so quite often already have been given (and also have developed) the tools with which we can succeed in realizing/embracing reasonable (and even sometimes maybe what some may view as not-so-reasonable) goals and objectives. We often hope for some level of supernatural intervention, when in fact, if we only make the true effort, we CAN do it for ourselves. This hypothesis is NOT absolute of course, there quite likely are instances when levels of divine assistance may be in order. Albeit, in taking this a bit further, one COULD actually be right in saying that, when the help we ask for doesn’t come, maybe it is because we didn’t actually need the help: And maybe we’ve already been given all that we need. Admittedly, this can obviously get into VERY complicated dynamics, if delving deeply as such.

What doesn’t necessarily need to be quite so complicated, is that, if we choose, we may be able to take ownership of the notion that a GENUINELY deep spirit of appreciation/gratitude may be the ‘magic elixir’ or formula which can prompt us to take true responsibility for our own health and wellbeing. Again, what a different world it would be!

Maybe, in becoming our ‘own angels,’ we can become more and more healthful conduits between Heaven and earth – more and more splendidly healthful diplomats (and maybe one of the differences between the former and latter is that divine angels should be capitalized, i.e., Angels).

In practical application (i.e., more and more as a genuinely healthful way of life), isn’t this so much about doing the right thing for the right selfless sake – without need for selfish recognition or hidden agendas? Isn’t it so much about lovingly embracing the notion that we are all SO much more in the same common boat than we often think and act? Isn’t it SO much about treating others with a living loving spirit of dignity, decency, goodness, and grace – and figuring out how to TRULY mean it, NO MATTER WHAT? Isn’t it SO much about supporting others in their healthful goals? Is this much about what ‘true freedom’ would be – this wonderful healthful spirit? How free are the angels that we traditionally view as angels? Are their wings real or are they symbolic of such splendid levels of freedom? Maybe it is easier for angels to be so good…so healthful – but does that have to stop us from trying? Maybe the REAL reward is simply in the trying.

We sometimes hear the sayings, “What would Jesus do?” “What would Buddha do?” “What would Mary do?” Those who are attached to religions and belief systems as such, already have such profoundly impeccable role models…not unlike quintessential angels. How much effort is it worth, to emulate such bright and beautiful models? It is up to each one of us to decide. Once again, it is all about “doing the right thing for the right selfless sake.” How healthful and beautiful is that? How happy?

If there is a Heaven, a ‘key to the universe,’ a ‘sixth sense,’ they are all about true honesty, promoting of true happiness and true freedom…but most importantly, needing less and less to hide behind. It is a ‘glimpse’ of an existence where there is no time, no space, no distance, but most importantly once again, “nothing to hide behind,” all is known. Oh boy! — Dr. Glen Hepker

The Lotus Flower Blossoms (as set forth in Chapter XV – “True Freedom” of my book, A Glimpse of Heaven: The Philosophy of True Health):

“There is a place where, wherever you are there, whatever you are doing…no matter what, in any given moment, there should be nowhere you would rather be. It is where you are right now – and you have the ability to so deeply and artfully appreciate your life and its living…to connect one healthful insight to the next, and make them all one…learning to witness this already-existing truth.

In the wilderness of our existence…a place of budding flowers about, about to unwrap in a showing of perfect appreciation for all to thrive upon, we are the flowers which can blossom again and again in each season of our deeper and deeper insights…all connected…each better and more healthful than before.

It is not unlike Heaven…and it can become Heaven, with enough insight and appreciation. It takes quite a few sparks, glimpses – spine-tingling moments…as a way-of-life which becomes more and more purposeful…more and more without time or space or distance. More and more there is less and less to hide behind.” (Copyright 2011)


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Could genuine appreciation/gratitude be the ‘magic elixir?’

Is it possible that a ‘WAY’ deep, loving, altruistic spirit of TRUE APPRECIATION (I’m ‘talkin’ the real deal’ here!) could be THE ‘magic elixir’ in realizing substantive health and healing, i.e., emotionally, physically, and spiritually?

What would it genuinely mean if this is true? What if quintessentially benevolent and altruistic sparkling spine-tingling/shivering true appreciation (as a WAY OF LIFE) is the ‘key’ to unlock the door to ‘true health’…impeccable healing and wellness?

What if it is true that just about all of us have abilities that would allow us to enjoy this level of health and well-being – if we are willing to work at it and display the wherewithal, i.e., learn more and more and more how to take the proverbial ‘bull by the horns’ – learn to so deeply appreciate, feel gratitude for all of the resplendent blessings and gifts which are always inside of us, and all around us, all of the time? What if we could learn to stop ignoring these beyond-words wonderful gifts and blessings? What would life be like? What level of mindfulness and gratitude would it require (maybe even taking years or decades to gather such skill), all the while knowing that there is ALWAYS room for improvement, greater and greater levels of objective insight and its practical applications?

Life can obviously be QUITE difficult at times, albeit what if we realized that a spirit inclusive of blaming, complaining, and lack of forgiveness is among the most real of diseases, what would it mean? What if it is SO much about ‘true health through true responsibility?’

What if, what if, what if…what if a significant key to all of this is in being willing to ask ourselves these questions on a daily basis?

It is going to take another couple of years, but my second book is going to address this issue in a conversational fiction-like dynamic, i.e.:

“A Glimpse of Heaven: The Philosophy of True Health
Volume II – True Appreciation”

Albeit, you don’t have to wait for my silly book, i.e., you can ask yourself these questions yourself, each day, if you so choose to think there might be something to this outlook. In my ages-old traditions, it is a substantive aspect of the Bright Beautiful School of Thought.

The following saying addresses the outlook herein, in a very special fashion:

“Bestow a string of faith

For faith we might have,

Unto the jester of light,

In the comedy of reflections,

As we stand upon this stage,

In awe of




– Dr. Glen Hepker

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2014 in review

The stats helper monkeys prepared a 2014 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

A New York City subway train holds 1,200 people. This blog was viewed about 7,000 times in 2014. If it were a NYC subway train, it would take about 6 trips to carry that many people.

Click here to see the complete report.

There is more – a lot more…

The world can often be a morbidly difficult, nasty, gruesome place. From this vantage point, the notion of taking true responsibility for our own health and well-being can no doubt seem quite silly and ‘beyond the pale.’

An excerpt from my book (A Glimpse of Heaven: The Philosophy of True Health) i.e., Chapter XII/”True Happiness: A Glimpse of Heaven”…

“There is no realistic doubt that much of the time contemporary life does require a majority of us to move quickly in order to be accountable to the myriad responsibilities which are manifest in our daily lives. Add to this mix some version of the emotional baggage which each of us lives with, and the weight on our shoulders can seem untenable: That is a very important point herein – when looking at life as such, without a seeming wherewithal to appreciate deeply meaningful aspects thereof, it can obviously seem impossible to deal with. The world can often be a morbidly difficult, nasty, gruesome place. From this vantage point, the notion of taking true responsibility for our own health and well-being can no doubt seem quite silly and ‘beyond the pale.’ Be it as it may, without our willingness to try to get better and better in dealing with ‘what life throws at us,’ what is the point? Should we blindly go on suffering? Is that what all of this is about – at best?

There is more – a lot more: There is true happiness, and it can be realized a majority of the time. In this imperfect existence (where succinct perfection cannot be realized), it is a ‘glimpse of heaven.’ It is learning to witness one’s internal and external environments in an objective, unblemished fashion, without the need for precognitive expectations; a living lightness of mind, body, and spirit; a tool with which we can learn the ability of ‘giving up the self,’ and requiring of healthful true faith and true effort. It is the nurtured ability to healthfully prompt genuine clarity and spine-tingling loving feelings at will.

A path toward such healthful insight and congruent way-of-life, can be found in an understanding of, what are coined in these traditions, as the Four Noble Truths:

~ The world is weighted-down and suffocated by suffering and misery.

~ Most suffering and misery is rooted in unhealthful craving/desire,
unhealthful styles of thinking and blemished views, a lack of critical
thinking skills and healthful logic, and anger, hatefulness/prejudice,
ignorance, greed, and fear of healthful change.

~ A Glimpse of Heaven – temporarily witnessing what it is like to enjoy
genuine happiness and objective insight – existing without the suffering
and misery rooted in the unhealthful portents of the second Noble Truth.

~ True Happiness – a healthful way-of-life in which at least a slight
majority of time one exists without the suffering and misery rooted in
the unhealthful portents of the second Noble Truth, e.g., the Eightfold
Healthful Path.” — Dr. Glen Hepker (Copyright 2011)

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